Find the time to look at the threads of your life’s tapestries

 

We met sophomore year in high school.

Our siblings were dating. This is the thread that brought us together.

Our friendship grew and grew. 

We were roommates our junior year and shared many life experiences together- each a thread of their own. Most shared adventures were on the field hockey field, lacrosse field, and ice rinks of Pomfret and the many athletic venues - across New England.

We graduated in 1989.

Off we went in different collegiate directions, one to Vermont, and one to New York State.

Our shared threads were invisible for a very long time after graduating-not by choice but because life took a hold and off we went.

We saw a glimpse of each other at our 5th year reunion at Pomfret. Always awkward I believe, those 5th year reunions. Schools gather us after just 5 years out and invite us to spend 3 days and 2 nights discussing where we all are in our lives, but marriage, jobs, finances and life’s purpose are so far off for most folks. Looking back, the conversations were a bit ungrounded to say the least.

Our lives began to blossom as the years passed and we were living on separate “islands.” One in California, the other in Maine and then Alaska. We never spoke on the phone but annual holiday cards would be exchanged. The common threads that I keep referring to remained invisible. It was like we were journeying in certain directions and our paths were not crossing. They were almost growing farther apart.

Fast forward to January 2021

We got each other’s email addresses after the holiday cards arrived and the first email exchange was essay like...trying to connect 32 years of distance. Then came the invitation to Marco Polo, and then FaceTime and now it is daily video and text messages. An in person  visit is next on our agendas!

It is now March of 2021 and we refer to each other as “new friends” who talk everyday!

What I want to share is this....

Today, Ashley Joy Wood and I have been experiencing a connection, a seeing eye to eye, a friendship that is INCREDIBLY inspiring. We went from growing together as best friends to journeying apart for 32 years. Connecting today has allowed us to share all our common threads that have been invisibly connecting us over the past 32 years! It is actually hard to put this experience into words, but I am trying because I can only hope others out there can find space in their world to connect with old friends. I encourage you to look at the threads of your life’s tapestries because that is where the real beauty lies.

I believe true friends are never really apart because they have common threads that never go away. The threads just need to be relocated and the connections become alive again.

It is with so much gratitude that I share that Ashley and I are experiencing a connection that started at Pomfret School 32 years ago and then broke off. But where the magic exists is that the threads were still being woven during our distance. There was still a weaving  together of threads to create a beautiful tapestry that we now, and only now, can we step back and notice and witness it’s beauty!

Both as professional counselors and as woman who embrace the dark and the light sides of life, and as persons who have an eye for mindfulness and compassion, we invite all of you to look for the connections at a thread level of your life’s tapestries. Maybe even reach into your past and take a closer look at those who have been present. 

If you are interested in learning more about Ashley and Liz  and what they are up to feel, free to look at the following

Ashley www.thelifesupportproject.com

Liz Mindful Moments with Ms Liz

Take it from two Pomfret graduates, whose buckets are overflowing with gratitude, that relationships always have the potential to be a foundation for something more.

From here, I look forward to sharing the dark, the light, the easy, the hard, the complex and the simple sides of growing old on this Earth with dear friends like Ashley. This universe never ceases to amaze me with it’s gifts.

Written with a heart of gratitude.

The day in 2002 when Skip said “there has been an avalanche, but we are okay.”

 

A friend from Alaska contacted Skip today requesting photos from Skip’s and John’s 2002 Avalanche, in order to update the accident page on Friends of The Chugach Avalanche Center Accidents Page.  This request - on top of approx.16 avalanche deaths - in the last 10 days here in the U.S, meant the topic of Avalanches was constant this afternoon in our home and it carried some extra emotional weight.

The words that follow are my account of that day in 2002. Anyone can ask Skip about his avalanche. He has always believed that retelling this experience, as challenging as it may be, will help everyone learn, including himself.

The challenge for him I believe and understand is sometimes how to put words to such a life experience. It easily could have been an experience with death and that is where we went today as we pulled out the fading ADN article from his file cabinet. The image is so real-the experience is so real-it lives in his cells. It lives in mine.

You can always read about this 2002 Avalanche in Jill Fredston’s book Snowstruck and Snowy Torrents 1996-2004

 

In the late afternoon of March 28th, 2002, I received a bunch of missed calls on my work cell. It was from an unknown number and I just assumed it was one of my parents from school. It later rang again and I was driving. I picked it up. It was Skip.

“Hello?” I said with a post school day flatness and fatigue.

“Ummm there has been an avalanche, but we are okay.” Skip said - also with a flatness  and fatigue in his voice.

I had been in Alaska for just over a year.  I had been backcountry skiing for just one winter. My avalanche awareness was not what it is today, but the word “Avalanche” got my attention.  Oh...and Skip and I had been dating for about a year and  my parents had just arrived in Anchorage the day before, to come meet this “boy” Skip that they sensed I was wild about. 

What transpired on that phone call was a conversation that assured me, they (John and Skip), were safe - at Kip Melling’s house-an Alaska Avalanche School instructor, Mtn Rescue volunteer and local who luckily saw the slide from his living room, across the valley. He was first on seen. The fact that the dogs were missing was a detail that later created a permanent knot in one’s chest-for many years to follow.

There were so many reasons they went out on that post-storm, bluebird day. There were so many reasons why this huge avalanche was triggered. There were so many reasons why they are both alive today. There are so many reasons why Skip still gets a bit silent when recounting that day- especially reviewing the images. That day - that avalanche - it changed their lives.

The Accidents reports give the best account of the details of the slide but those close to Skip know it was so humbling to awake the next morning with the front page image being of the slide and the talk of the dogs missing. But what Skip will not speak of and avoided even today, was what he did right.When a ski partner can locate and dig out another from a multiple feet burial, after being buried for a significant amount of time, it is a fact that this wife (and ski partner) doesn’t forget. Skip will never credit himself because the avalanche was triggered due to mistakes and that is where his energies lie. 

He was trained, he knew what to do- he had the gear- he knew had to use it and he had to use it. The hole below where he located and dug John out was eye opening to return to the next day. We had returned to search for the dogs along with many community members. I remember taking this picture and it all sinking in a bit deeper-no pun intended.

Fast forward to today-2021, and the voices being heard in ski communities today across the U.S. have offered everything from sadness, judgement, regret and fear in relation to the many deaths. This is a familiar and unfortunate trend during backcountry ski seasons. But what we all need to know is-those voices don’t matter most. What mattes is what our own voice says inside ourselves. What words do we tell ourselves on a powder day in the backcountry? We need to listen real close and we need to be the judge of our knowledge, our choices and our actions. We need to ask the right questions. We need to listen. We need to look. Not listening to our instincts and our gut, can be devastating.  This is easier said than done.

Practice it with your ski partners. Challenge each other by asking what voices are going on in each other’s heads? Our brains hold a lot of info-use it. If we don’t hear a voice of knowledge, reason, or experience, then might we consider not taking the risk and dropping in for that line, or taking that last run on a different slope?

My words above are quite jumbled but I thank you for reading. May you and your loved ones be safe in the backcountry tomorrow and all days forward. Thanks also to the amazing folks at all the Avalanche Forecast Centers and Avalanche Education venues through the U.S. Their work and your support of their work is crucial to success in the backcountry. 

AAA has a fabulous account of many of the avalanche accidents back to 2010 and as unfortunate as these accidents are, it is our responsibility to learn from them.

Tales from the Trail

We are one year into our life in Maine and it is still wicked good!

One of my favorite things when living out west was following a lot of the Avalanche Forecast Centers. Most of them had a non profit arm (Friends of...) run by volunteers. Their goal was to raise money and awareness to keep backcountry avy education and forecasting supported well into the future.

Now I find myself in the summer season, in Maine and I love following all the mountain bike organizations that exist in our Maine/NH area. These mtn biking organizations are specific to riding bikes. Most are filled by community volunteers and model leadership, inclusion, and forward thinking. If you ride, you have a voice. If you become a member, you have a seat at the table.

These mtn bike organizations gather like minded folks to keep minds and bodies "pedaling" in a forward motion.

link to Central Maine Mtn Biking

Link to Littleton NH Mountain Biking

Link to Greater Portland Mtn Biking

Link to Bethel Maine Mtn Biking

Link to Bethlehem NH Mtn Biking

Link to Carrabassett Valley, Maine Mtn Biking

Link to Gorham NH Mtn Biking

This summer I have had wonderful experiences on trails in Maine and NH. I met local riders who hit their locals NH/Maine trails on a daily basis. I met riders whose best partner is Strava. I met riders who are new to the area and just need help finding the trail heads. I met riders who prefer to ride in large groups. Some prefer to ride alone. I met riders who built the trails and host the work parties. I have met riders whose goal is to explore new networks every Friday and hit up a local food/beer venue every time. I met parents whose goal it is to introduce the kids to the joy mtn biking through their summer camps or family wkd rides. 
Mtn biking trails bring communities together and it takes a positive and visionary community of riders to keep this momentum going.

If your area has a Mtn Biking organization, I encourage all riders to donate to it (time or money)

Learn when the volunteer trail work days are and join the public board mtgs and have a say. If you build it, we can ride. Our minds and bodies can all roll us into an exciting future of mtn bike trails and beyond.

Ride on
Ride on.

Our love for Alaska is lifelong!

We relocated from Alaska after 18 years. We chose Maine as our new home.The reasons are many and all with a delightful twist of positive bliss. We desired change in our day to day routines. We wanted to be closer to our blood relatives and dear friends in the form of elders . We wanted to be present to play and support nieces and nephews while they enter young adulthood. The opportunity arose and we took it.

It has been one big celebration. We love living in Maine

It was hard to leave our near and dear friends in Alaska after so many years... and the terrain... and landscape... that we called home. 

Surprisingly, I keep thinking the words will come to me to help explain this whole paradigm shift (in the form of the move) and how easy it has been to accept it, but the words are not here yet.

My most recent surprise is the daily love for our Alaskan ski experiences.  I look at pictures and watch our videos on a weekly basis. I don't wipe my tears away, I just feel a wicked full heart.

 I cannot believe this was our home and where we skied for 18 years. The memories are lifelong.

Our ski partners are some of life's best friends and we miss them incredibly, but again- no regrets.

Jo-Jo we love you and miss skiing with you!

So take this blog as a thank you blog to the snowy mtns of Alaska and those that we experienced them with. To those mtns, those skin tracks, those early season turns, those friends, and  those spring ski adventures. I will never say goodbye. 

More likely, the longer I live in Maine, the more appreciation I will have for you.

I💜Chugach (and Talkeetnas) forever and ever!

Returning to our Tribe

This March my Mom and Dad added to their tribe, their canine tribe. Meet Selby an (almost) 9 year old guide dog- out of The Guiding Eyes for The Blind School in Yorktown Heights New York. She was raised by my  Mom in Maine 8 years ago - prior to placement as a Guide Dog. Selby has been a guide dog for 7 years of her life. She turns 9 in April. She guided in Florida. She just retired this month and will be moving north for her retirement, to live with her raiser- my Mom- who happens to be MY RAISER TOO!

It is always bitter sweet when a Guide Dog is retired from a life of service.The departure for any dog, from their handler's life is a very challenging transition, for both human and canine, yet also opens doors of opportunity to all parties involved,

Selby, like all Guide Dogs has a love for her raisers and her bond with Mom is wonderful to witness.

Selby was picked up in Florida a couple weeks ago by my Mom and Dad and was driven north to join her new/old tribe. I was told she recognized many of her human raisers and is loving meeting the new canine members of the Scribner families. 

_________________________________________________________________________________

Sadie welcomes Selby to her home-

Fletch, Selby, and Isla doing the entryway pose. Note Fletch being sure to use his body, not his words, to express who is Alpha in the house. 

Selby, as mentioned before has spent her life working as a Gude Dog. She is now learning how to add play back into her life and romp and tug and run. Fletch is modeling it wonderfully. But Selby still enjoys her solo moments, as seen here as she reflects on her appreciation for Nina and the new tribe.

My Mom, Nina Scribner raised Selby with the help of many volunteers and puppy raisers in the Maine region.
I know I have stacks of Selby pictures in my collection - showing mom treat training, leash training and joining socialization classes - but this message isn't about what was, but is about what is going to be.

Selby is returning to her people, her raisers, her original tribe after putting incredible effort into her career as a Guide Dog. She will live the rest of her life with my Mom and Dad and Fletch and all the lab cousins in Maine.

As a Guide Dog in Florida, Selby spent years in relationship with her handler in Florida, guiding him through daily routines and practices. She filled his life with fullness. Selby's job as a Guide Dog was her life - her identity- for many years and it filled her soul.
Her dedication as a Guide Dog was impressive.

This blog actually holds another message and that is one of....
'Selby- we are following your lead!"


The idea of returning to your tribe is what Skip and I are taking action on. As many have heard, our parents are aging in a wonderful direction -the younger side of old/older side of young  and we want to be present with them.

The Repettos

                              

The Scribners

Selby- we are returning to our raisers too - and thanks for leading the way. What a wonderful purpose to have - fill your life with meaning and career- learn to play with good folks and then- when possible - return back often to your raisers to check in on life and reconnect with your roots!

WOOF!
Oh and Jupiter, our 10 year old lab is excited to meet your tribe for the first time  and  to learn some socialization from some Maine Labs too!
See you soon!

Jupiter - 10 years young- from Wasilla, Alaska

Trust your gut

Recently in my life I have been holding onto these beliefs -
I  trust the universe. I trust the outcome of decisions and the days ahead. I trust all will work out. 
It feels good to trust. 


So this post is about yesterday. Yesterday was a day of Ah-ha's
It all connected for me and it connected so intensely by the end of the day that I thought I would try and share it with you.
I started my day with a yoga practice that was all about letting our inner light / fire shine.

It was a new practice and I listened and learned. At the end I was grabbing for my journal and writing down words that held such meaning, purpose, and comfort. I know those moments happen to most of us at various stages of our life; when we slow down to listen and look, we will hear messages that fill our heart and guide our conscience.
This practice had me very focused on my abdomen and the light that is always there - radiating. I was reminded that our bodies- filled with cells- have all that they need to move forward in life, make the right decisions and to be well and healthy. Our bodies want to do the right thing. Our internal light wants to radiate out and shine; there is an inner fire that can help us  and is always lit, if we tune in and let it awaken.
I loved this practice
Click here: Morning yoga to let your inner light shine

Next came the kitchen - making breakfast, I had a glow from the inside out and I felt balanced.

The radio was playing and sure enough I heard talk of "our gut" and how doctors are now speaking to people about" the gut" and how it plays a role in patients' lives. What our gut tells us matters. They then spoke about the cells that run from our gut up to our esophagus and began to get scientific and at that time I was so jazzed at the synchronicity of the topic and my yoga practice-I kind of lost focus.

I love when external experiences connect with internal experiences-I call them synchronicities. NPR usually plays a role in them as their radio shows seem to be purposeful and when I stop and listen- there are connections to something in my life, here and how and today.

Again-I feel radiating from the inside out. I am realizing as I drive to work- it is not always about trusting the external world, but that the light and guidance needed is INSIDE OF US. We have what we need. Our job is to listen and look, or stretch and breathe or sit and be. There are so many unique ways to tune into that gut, abdomen, 2nd/3rd chakra, solar plexus....what ever your language is...we all have a belly and I am finally learning to love mine.

Did I just say that? "I love my belly?" Now that is a whole other blog unto it self!!!!


Okay- last phase of my day that had meaning was my lunch break. I sat quietly inside my office and played a Ted Talk while eating  a delicious meal thanks to staff potluck.

I just randomly searched a  Ted Talk title-like I usually do...this time I googled "trust yourself Ted Talk"and I watched the first one that came up.

I have since watched it three times and it became the inspiration for this blog. So before you watch it, I invite you to take a few deep breaths into your gut and relax those shoulders, get in a comfortable position and last thing- grab your journal.

After  yesterday-I currently have a level of trust in my gut that I have never had before and with all that is going on in our life right now - (moving- leaving- arriving- changing- selling- buying-working-retiring-resigning-applying-planning) ...trusting our guts is pretty darn important!

So with that...
Click here: What decision are you NOT making in YOUR life?
Enjoy

Turnagain Pass fits in the Suitcase in my Heart

As I sit to write this blog reflecting on todays ski day, I peek down at my tea bag and it says

"If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere" - Vincent Van Gogh

Today was a BEAUTY EVERYWHERE day in Turnagain Pass!

I have found there is a wide-eye approach to all vistas now in Alaska due to the changes ahead. I think knowing we will be moving this summer  I now look with deep intentions at everything here. 

Today and recent days I have found all conversations, run-ins with friends and neighbors and coincidental experiences around town have also been landing in the suitcase in my heart. I am taking this all with me when we relocate out of Alaska

I am taking the fact that no matter how crowded Turnagain Pass gets every interaction/conversation on the skin track is a fun one. Today had some real unique connections.

Here are just a few for your entertainment:

Uptrack interactions today...

• Todd- skier by day and Midnight Sun Zombie by night-leading us to a fine line of powder-thank-you!
• Shannon - who I met from a Craigslist sale of my airbag pack over 5 years ago AND he is from Cape Elizabeth Maine! 
• Dave and his wife- who are friends with neighbor Sally and know Skip via Music and F-CNFAIC-great to ski that line with you both today!
• Josh- educator-skier - Airport Heights local and Sarah's friend who is always fun to run into on the trails!
• Ziggy's and Sadie's human parents and their crew of skiers-a happy ending story on the up track and out track after the dogs seemed to be asking everyone "are you my mommy?" 
• To the guys that knew Jo from last weekends ski - again- one of those- Was that you on Magnum last weekend...and they continued talking like they knew each other.

There is something about these mtns. I get in them and all worries go away and the only focus is snow safety and snow quality. Finding the happy mix.

 Today was a day where elevation was not your friend and you could see people were finding this out as the day went on. We started meeting up more on the lower elevation trails with big smiles.

 And though many folks look at "crowds" in the backcountry as "glass half empty."

Today- the snow, the weather and the people all worked out. Lives were connected and intertwined like the turns that covered the hill. Like most weekend skis, we all share the same up track and out track...but could choose our own lines in-between. Quite symbolic of life in general if you ask me!

 I end this day with the suitcase in my heart even fuller due to the skiing and human interactions  in Turnagain Pass

May your up track take you to where you wish to be

May your turns be made with ease

May your partners keep you safe and 

May you sleep well at night